By Lisa Cohn and Dr. Patrick Cohn
How do you help a young athlete whose dreams in sports are undermined by others’ jealousy?
In the case of Lela’s son, “Frank,” it’s a big challenge. Frank is a high school student and Olympic-caliber athlete in track. He is ranked nationally for his event and age group.
Frank’s problem: He lives in a very small town where there’s only one track coach, a coach whose son also takes part in track. Others are jealous of Frank’s talents and his high goals in sports.
The track coach tries to derail Frank’s efforts to become an Olympic athlete, refusing to give him extra gym time to work out. The coach told him he should simply focus on high school sports, rather than follow his dream of training for the Olympics.
What’s more, the basketball and football coaches in this small town think they “own” this young man’s talent. They’re constantly pressuring him to play on their teams instead of following his dream. They want to use his talent to help their teams succeed.
How can sports parents deal with such a dilemma?
Lela and other sports parents should encourage their young athletes to follow their dreams. Lela needs to help her son ignore the distractions created by others’ jealousy and focus on doing what he loves. That means training, competing and continuing to improve.
Lela needs to help Frank tune out the worries created by others’ opposition to his dream. He needs to focus on the tasks he needs to achieve his goals. An athlete’s dreams can quickly sink when non-believers beat him up. His confidence can take a hit.
In addition, if Frank doesn’t want to play football or basketball, he should not play. His talent is his own—not his small town’s.
Successful athletes are able to keep their goals and dreams alive in the face of criticism from others. Sometimes an athlete will give in to the pressure he feels from parents, coaches, and friends. In this case, the athlete competes to satisfy others instead of following his dreams.
Parents need to ensure their kids take part in sports for the right reasons. Young athletes should be genuinely self-motivated to practice and compete in sports.
Award winning parenting writer Lisa Cohn and Youth Sports Psychology expert Dr. Patrick Cohn are co-founders of The Ultimate Sports Parent. Pick up their free e-book, “Ten Tips to Improve Confidence and Success in Young Athletes” by visiting http://www.youthsportspsychology.com
Showing posts with label youth sports psychology. Show all posts
Showing posts with label youth sports psychology. Show all posts
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Redefining Winning for Young Athletes
By Lisa Cohn and Dr. Patrick Cohn
Young athletes want to feel like winners—whether or not they’re always scoring and beating their opponents. Sports parents can help their kids feel good about their experiences simply by taking the focus off the “win.”
David Jacobson, a spokesman for the Positive Coaching Alliance, says his organization wants to re-define the term “winning” in ways that provide important benefits to young athletes.
“Of course people want to win,” says Jacobson. “My organization advocates trying as hard as you can to win.
But there's more going on than finishing with the highest score. There are so many educational opportunities. For example, if you can put forth maximum effort, you become a winner.”
If coaches and sports parents can frame conversations in this fashion, kids don’t feel as nervous. “They are more likely to feel successful and be successful,” he says.
For example, let’s say your young athletes are outsized and outmatched. How can you help them feel like winners? Ask them to go into the game against a formidable opponent with an eye toward succeeding in small ways, says Jacobson.
Give young athletes specific objectives that help them attain excellence. For example, . in soccer, a coach might ask kids to try to nab every loose ball.
Even if the final score is 5-0 and your team loses, if you've gotten to every loose ball, you've won a small victory that imparts confidence to kids!
In sports psychology, we call this focusing on manageable objectives or small, easy-to-accomplish goals. Coaches and parents should ask kids to do this to help them focus on effort, rather than outcome.
When kids are too focused on results and wins, it's a huge distraction. It's harder for them to succeed and feel confidentfocus on the things they need to do to execute well in the present moment.
As a sports parent or youth coach, it's your job to help kids identify and focus on mini-objectives. Ask them to try and get aim for two rebounds in basketball, or to focus on making four out of six quality shots on goal. Change their mindset; help them enjoy the game more by focusing on the process and the fun!
You can also help build their confidence and success by consistently telling them mistakes are okay, says Jacobson.
“You have to impart the notion that mistakes are okay. The greatest success occurs if you make mistakes. You can't learn--or get to other side of envelope--if you don't push yourself and make mistakes,” he says.
For example, you're not learning as an ice skater unless you're falling down.
Not only do you need to tell kids mistakes are okay. You need to reward them for making them and use them as a learning opportunity.
"You want them to keep trying to be aggressive and willing to push the outside of the envelope," he says.
“Through positive reinforcement, tell the athlete at every turn, 'You didn't get the ball there, but you tried something new, and that's a step in the right direction. Great work,’” he explains.
Award winning parenting writer Lisa Cohn and Youth Sports Psychology expert Dr. Patrick Cohn are co-founders of The Ultimate Sports Parent. Pick up their free e-book, “Ten Tips to Improve Confidence and Success in Young Athletes” by visiting http://www.youthsportspsychology.com
Young athletes want to feel like winners—whether or not they’re always scoring and beating their opponents. Sports parents can help their kids feel good about their experiences simply by taking the focus off the “win.”
David Jacobson, a spokesman for the Positive Coaching Alliance, says his organization wants to re-define the term “winning” in ways that provide important benefits to young athletes.
“Of course people want to win,” says Jacobson. “My organization advocates trying as hard as you can to win.
But there's more going on than finishing with the highest score. There are so many educational opportunities. For example, if you can put forth maximum effort, you become a winner.”
If coaches and sports parents can frame conversations in this fashion, kids don’t feel as nervous. “They are more likely to feel successful and be successful,” he says.
For example, let’s say your young athletes are outsized and outmatched. How can you help them feel like winners? Ask them to go into the game against a formidable opponent with an eye toward succeeding in small ways, says Jacobson.
Give young athletes specific objectives that help them attain excellence. For example, . in soccer, a coach might ask kids to try to nab every loose ball.
Even if the final score is 5-0 and your team loses, if you've gotten to every loose ball, you've won a small victory that imparts confidence to kids!
In sports psychology, we call this focusing on manageable objectives or small, easy-to-accomplish goals. Coaches and parents should ask kids to do this to help them focus on effort, rather than outcome.
When kids are too focused on results and wins, it's a huge distraction. It's harder for them to succeed and feel confidentfocus on the things they need to do to execute well in the present moment.
As a sports parent or youth coach, it's your job to help kids identify and focus on mini-objectives. Ask them to try and get aim for two rebounds in basketball, or to focus on making four out of six quality shots on goal. Change their mindset; help them enjoy the game more by focusing on the process and the fun!
You can also help build their confidence and success by consistently telling them mistakes are okay, says Jacobson.
“You have to impart the notion that mistakes are okay. The greatest success occurs if you make mistakes. You can't learn--or get to other side of envelope--if you don't push yourself and make mistakes,” he says.
For example, you're not learning as an ice skater unless you're falling down.
Not only do you need to tell kids mistakes are okay. You need to reward them for making them and use them as a learning opportunity.
"You want them to keep trying to be aggressive and willing to push the outside of the envelope," he says.
“Through positive reinforcement, tell the athlete at every turn, 'You didn't get the ball there, but you tried something new, and that's a step in the right direction. Great work,’” he explains.
Award winning parenting writer Lisa Cohn and Youth Sports Psychology expert Dr. Patrick Cohn are co-founders of The Ultimate Sports Parent. Pick up their free e-book, “Ten Tips to Improve Confidence and Success in Young Athletes” by visiting http://www.youthsportspsychology.com
Saturday, December 15, 2007
Youth Sports: An Athlete’s "Emotional Tank"
By Lisa Cohn and Dr. Patrick Cohn
How can parents and coaches fill a young athlete’s “emotional tank?”
Coaches need to praise kids five times before they provide one piece of constructive criticism, says David Jacobson, a spokesman for the Positive Coaching Alliance, based at Stanford University.
“We liken a child’s emotional tank to a car’s gas tank. When the tank is full, it runs well. When it’s drained, it doesn’t run well,” he explains.
To fill a child’s or teen’s tank, parents and coaches need to provide a steady flow of specific, truthful praise, Jacobson says. When you do this, sports kids are more confident. They’re also more open to criticism and more likely to listen to what the coach or parent has to say.
“When you’re praising, you’re creating a great feeling for the child so he or she wants to continue the work required to excel as an athlete and take away all the life lessons that sports has to offer,” he says.
It’s critical to build young athletes’ confidence by praising them. For many young athletes, confidence is fragile and wavers easily depending on their performance and feedback from parents and coaches. They’re less likely to feel confident if they make mistakes or lose a match and get criticized.
One of your goals is to help your child develop a more stable level of confidence. Help them through the bumps in the confidence roller coaster.
Here’s another way to fill your kids’ emotional tanks and boost their confidence: Teach them how to praise themselves. Help your kids create a confidence resume. It may include a fun practice, a past experience, a successful game, skills improvement or good coaching. Ask your kids to review their confidence resumes before competing.
To develop confidence, kids, should have a “highlight reel” in their heads just before a game, says Robert Troutwine, Ph.D., founder of Troutwine and Associates. That’s a mental image of their most amazing play, move or moment in sports. It’s an image of a play, move or moment that makes them feel on top of the world!
Remember: The last thing we want is for your young athletes to mentally rehearse bad plays, moves or moments in sports!
Why? Because they’ll be practicing the wrong things. They’ll allow self-doubt to creep into their minds. They’ll be totally distracted!
However, playing in their heads a highlight reel that’s a totally awesome moment will help them feel confident—it will give them the feeling they can and will succeed.
Award winning parenting writer Lisa Cohn and Youth Sports Psychology expert Dr. Patrick Cohn are co-founders of The Ultimate Sports Parent. Pick up their free e-book, “Ten Tips to Improve Confidence and Success in Young Athletes” by visiting www.youthsportspsychology.com.
How can parents and coaches fill a young athlete’s “emotional tank?”
Coaches need to praise kids five times before they provide one piece of constructive criticism, says David Jacobson, a spokesman for the Positive Coaching Alliance, based at Stanford University.
“We liken a child’s emotional tank to a car’s gas tank. When the tank is full, it runs well. When it’s drained, it doesn’t run well,” he explains.
To fill a child’s or teen’s tank, parents and coaches need to provide a steady flow of specific, truthful praise, Jacobson says. When you do this, sports kids are more confident. They’re also more open to criticism and more likely to listen to what the coach or parent has to say.
“When you’re praising, you’re creating a great feeling for the child so he or she wants to continue the work required to excel as an athlete and take away all the life lessons that sports has to offer,” he says.
It’s critical to build young athletes’ confidence by praising them. For many young athletes, confidence is fragile and wavers easily depending on their performance and feedback from parents and coaches. They’re less likely to feel confident if they make mistakes or lose a match and get criticized.
One of your goals is to help your child develop a more stable level of confidence. Help them through the bumps in the confidence roller coaster.
Here’s another way to fill your kids’ emotional tanks and boost their confidence: Teach them how to praise themselves. Help your kids create a confidence resume. It may include a fun practice, a past experience, a successful game, skills improvement or good coaching. Ask your kids to review their confidence resumes before competing.
To develop confidence, kids, should have a “highlight reel” in their heads just before a game, says Robert Troutwine, Ph.D., founder of Troutwine and Associates. That’s a mental image of their most amazing play, move or moment in sports. It’s an image of a play, move or moment that makes them feel on top of the world!
Remember: The last thing we want is for your young athletes to mentally rehearse bad plays, moves or moments in sports!
Why? Because they’ll be practicing the wrong things. They’ll allow self-doubt to creep into their minds. They’ll be totally distracted!
However, playing in their heads a highlight reel that’s a totally awesome moment will help them feel confident—it will give them the feeling they can and will succeed.
Award winning parenting writer Lisa Cohn and Youth Sports Psychology expert Dr. Patrick Cohn are co-founders of The Ultimate Sports Parent. Pick up their free e-book, “Ten Tips to Improve Confidence and Success in Young Athletes” by visiting www.youthsportspsychology.com.
Monday, September 17, 2007
Helping Young Athletes Trust in Their Skills
Do your sports kids excel in practice, but freeze up in competition? Do they have a hard time just being spontaneous and “free” when they compete? If so, you might need to help your child trust his or her athletic ability...
Freezing up in competition is a common challenge for young athletes. Some kids and teens love to practice and improve, but when it comes to competing, they suddenly don’t trust in their own skills and or have confidence in their abilities.
All young athletes face a lack of trust and confidence in their skills from time to time.
Maybe they’re new to a particular sport. Maybe they’re trying to learn a brand new skill and haven’t quite gotten it yet. Perhaps they’re perfectionists and feel that their performance isn’t “perfect” enough. They may also be afraid of making mistakes, so they play or compete tentatively.
Why should kids trust in their skills and abilities?
If they believe in their ability to execute a skill successfully, they’ll feel more confident. And more confidence will lead to more trust. That’s crucial to success and happiness in sports. In order to trust, athletes need to let go of conscious control—of their motor skills, for example. They must be able to perform spontaneously and intuitively.
As parents and coaches, there’s lots you can do to help young athletes learn to compete with trust and freedom.
First of all, look at your own behavior. Do you:
>>Ask your child to focus on proper or perfect form during the game?
>>Encourage your child to try to be perfect when performing?
>>Over coach your child right before game time?
>>Introduce a different method than the coach’s and confuse your child?
Instead, you need to:
>Help kids trust their skills on game day
>Help young athletes set goals
>Guide sports kids who are dealing with difficult feelings and much more!
Hop over to our web site to snag your copy:
http://youthsportspsychology.com/
Sincerely,
Patrick Cohn, Ph.D., Mental Training Expert
P.S. The Ultimate Sports Parent workbook program comes with a neat
bonus that helps parents act and say the right things before a game or
competition:
http://youthsportspsychology.com/
©2007 The Ultimate Sports Parent by Peak Performance Sports
Instilling Mental Skills for Sports & Life!
Freezing up in competition is a common challenge for young athletes. Some kids and teens love to practice and improve, but when it comes to competing, they suddenly don’t trust in their own skills and or have confidence in their abilities.
All young athletes face a lack of trust and confidence in their skills from time to time.
Maybe they’re new to a particular sport. Maybe they’re trying to learn a brand new skill and haven’t quite gotten it yet. Perhaps they’re perfectionists and feel that their performance isn’t “perfect” enough. They may also be afraid of making mistakes, so they play or compete tentatively.
Why should kids trust in their skills and abilities?
If they believe in their ability to execute a skill successfully, they’ll feel more confident. And more confidence will lead to more trust. That’s crucial to success and happiness in sports. In order to trust, athletes need to let go of conscious control—of their motor skills, for example. They must be able to perform spontaneously and intuitively.
As parents and coaches, there’s lots you can do to help young athletes learn to compete with trust and freedom.
First of all, look at your own behavior. Do you:
>>Ask your child to focus on proper or perfect form during the game?
>>Encourage your child to try to be perfect when performing?
>>Over coach your child right before game time?
>>Introduce a different method than the coach’s and confuse your child?
Instead, you need to:
- Help your young athletes leave practice on the practice field, and learn to trust in their abilities.
- Help them switch into an athletic, “let it happen” mindset in competition. Tell them to react intuitively, to keep it simple: See the ball and hit it.
- Help them think of ways to perform in the here-and-now. How can they get the job done without worrying about or analyzing how to get the job done?
- Help them accept that they can’t perform perfectly.
Want to learn more about how to help kids improve their performance, trust and confidence?
Check out our Ultimate Sports Parent workbook/CD program....
You’ll learn how to:
>Instill a confident mindset in your young athletes
>Help kids trust their skills on game day
>Help young athletes set goals
>Guide sports kids who are dealing with difficult feelings and much more!
Hop over to our web site to snag your copy:
http://youthsportspsychology.com/
Sincerely,
Patrick Cohn, Ph.D., Mental Training Expert
P.S. The Ultimate Sports Parent workbook program comes with a neat
bonus that helps parents act and say the right things before a game or
competition:
http://youthsportspsychology.com/
©2007 The Ultimate Sports Parent by Peak Performance Sports
Instilling Mental Skills for Sports & Life!
Thursday, May 17, 2007
Helping Your Sports Kid Set Good Goals
Too often, sports parents set goals for their kids that are different than the kids' goals. It’s important for parents and coaches to help sports kids identify their own goals and then help them follow through on them.
Says Dony Wilcher, a popular basketball coach in Portland, OR., “I had one parent who wanted the world for his child. He went out of his way to get him the right equipment and send him to the top camps.”
“At the end of it all, he was perplexed that the kid was not a superstar. In some cases, kids will veer away from the sport altogether if the parents' goals are different than theirs.”
At first, most kids generally want to play sports to have fun and be with friends. At that point, that’s their goal, and it’s not necessary to set goals with them.
When they begin to be competitive--when they play in tournaments or join competitive teams--it's time to begin talking about their goals. For some children, this might be as young as 7 or 8--if they display unusual talent and motivation.
For example, I worked with one 8-year-old motocross racer who spent four hours per day training. It would be appropriate to talk about goals with a child like this.
When you're talking with your young athlete, begin with a broad, open-ended question.
If, for example. your child's goal is to try out for and make his or her high school basketball team, that's the long-term goal. Ask the child what he or she needs to do to make the team.
Evaluate his or her skills in dribbling, free-throw shooting, and defense, for example. Try to de-emphasize the long-term goal of making the team. When young athletes are too preoccupied with making the team, they may impose too many expectations on themselves and undermine their confidence.
Instead, parents and coaches should help young athletes identify smaller, shorter-term goals, such as improving their free-throw shooting.
Once you've helped your young athletes identify their goals, it's your job to help them aim toward them. The parents, coaches and athletes need to work as a team.
Parents should support their athletes by driving them to practices, cheering them on, and finding ways to ensure they are able to follow through on their commitments.
However, it's critical to be flexible. Parents and coaches should help kids modify their goals on a weekly or monthly basis.
Want to learn more about helping young athletes feel happy and confident in sports? Check out our latest program, “The Ultimate Sports Parent” workbook and CD program:
http://youthsportspsychology.com/ultimate_sports_parent_workbook.php
You'll learn...
- How much pressure is too much
- How to prepare young athletes on game day
- How to help kids stop worrying about what everyone thinks of their
performance - How to help kids overcome their fear of failure
- And much more!
Sincerely,
Patrick Cohn, Ph.D., Mental Training Expert
P.S. 'The Ultimate Sports Parent' workbook program comes with a neat
bonus that helps parents act and say the right things before a game
or competition, which you can download immediately:
http://youthsportspsychology.com/ultimate_sports_parent_workbook.php
©2007 The Ultimate Sports Parent by Peak Performance Sports
http://www.youthsportspsychology.com/
Wednesday, May 2, 2007
Helping Perfectionistic Sports Kids
Often, we hear from parents who worry about young athletes who are too hard on themselves. You’re likely familiar with these types of athletes. They’re perfectionists or perfectionistic.
Perfectionistic athletes criticize themselves for making mistakes, often hold very high expectations for themselves, and get frustrated easily after making mistakes.
On the positive side, these athletes have a strong work ethic, are committed to their goals, and want to learn and improve. In fact, most athletes display at least some 'perfectionistic' traits from time to time.
It’s not always easy for perfectionist athletes to perform up to their abilities. When kids try to be perfect, they can undermine their own talents quickly. They hold strict expectations about their performance, are afraid of failing, and worry too much about results—statistics, goals scored or wins.
If your young athlete is a perfectionist, begin by identifying the traits that may be sabotaging his or her confidence in competition.
Does your child want to win so badly that he feels anxious? Is your athlete afraid of failing or losing? Does he or she play tentatively during games? Does your athlete try too hard and then over-control his or her performance?
One important task for you as parent....
Parents with perfectionist athletes should help kids identify their high (often unrealistic) expectations about how they should perform. Then help your child replace these expectations with simple process goals.
For example, say your athlete believes he or she should hit every shot perfectly. Suggest that your child replace his or her “I must hit every shot perfectly” mindset with these simple process goals or objectives: 1. Pick the right target for each shot 2. Be decisive 3. Be confident.
Want to learn more about how to build confidence and success in young athletes? Check out our workbook/CD program, “The Ultimate Sports Parent: A 14-Day Plan for Kids’ Success in Sports.”
You’ll also learn how to:
©2007 The Ultimate Sports Parent by Peak Performance Sports
Instilling Mental Skills for Sports & Life!http://www.youthsportspsychology.com/
Perfectionistic athletes criticize themselves for making mistakes, often hold very high expectations for themselves, and get frustrated easily after making mistakes.
On the positive side, these athletes have a strong work ethic, are committed to their goals, and want to learn and improve. In fact, most athletes display at least some 'perfectionistic' traits from time to time.
It’s not always easy for perfectionist athletes to perform up to their abilities. When kids try to be perfect, they can undermine their own talents quickly. They hold strict expectations about their performance, are afraid of failing, and worry too much about results—statistics, goals scored or wins.
If your young athlete is a perfectionist, begin by identifying the traits that may be sabotaging his or her confidence in competition.
Does your child want to win so badly that he feels anxious? Is your athlete afraid of failing or losing? Does he or she play tentatively during games? Does your athlete try too hard and then over-control his or her performance?
One important task for you as parent....
Parents with perfectionist athletes should help kids identify their high (often unrealistic) expectations about how they should perform. Then help your child replace these expectations with simple process goals.
For example, say your athlete believes he or she should hit every shot perfectly. Suggest that your child replace his or her “I must hit every shot perfectly” mindset with these simple process goals or objectives: 1. Pick the right target for each shot 2. Be decisive 3. Be confident.
Want to learn more about how to build confidence and success in young athletes? Check out our workbook/CD program, “The Ultimate Sports Parent: A 14-Day Plan for Kids’ Success in Sports.”
You’ll also learn how to:
- Decide how much pressure is too much pressure
- Motivate kids to master their sport
- Help kids feel confident in athletics
- Help young athletes not worry about what everyone thinks
- Guide children as they cope with frustration, anger and heartache in sports
- Cope with kids’ difficult or negative coaches
- Provide young athletes with the right kind of support after defeats or mistakes
Sincerely,
Patrick Cohn, Ph.D., Mental Training Expert
& Lisa Cohn, Youth Sports Parenting Author
P.S. Do you and your child want to learn how to overcome perfectionism, fear of failure, and perform up to one's potential? You might want to check out our new workbook to help sports kids
©2007 The Ultimate Sports Parent by Peak Performance Sports
Instilling Mental Skills for Sports & Life!http://www.youthsportspsychology.com/
Thursday, April 5, 2007
How to Boost Kids' Sports Confidence
We often see kids who excel in practice, but freeze up during games. This can be frustrating and confusing for parents and coaches. What's going on in the young athlete's mind and what can sports parents and coaches do about it?
First, sports parents and coaches should help young athletes understand that they create their own sports confidence mindset. If kids begin a game needing immediate results (such as getting the first hit or basket of the game), they're hurting their confidence.
It is critical to remind young athletes that they've been practicing to develop confidence for many years. Don't let them lose their hard-earned confidence by worrying about achieving immediate results!
What's more, athletes need to understand that they'll be more successful if they assume full responsibility for their own confidence before competition begins. This is why it's called self-confidence!
Often, athletes take a back seat approach and wait until they make a couple of plays before they decide how confident they should feel.
If this is how your young athlete thinks, they need positive results before they feel confident. In other words, they need to make that great hit or basket before they can begin to feel confident.
If this is true of the young athletes in your life, you can help. Tell them they need to change how they think before entering competition. Tell them not to worry about making that first hit, goal or basket right away!
Instead, they should draw on their many successes even before the game or competition begins.
We suggest that you learn how to boost your child’s confidence. And we can help. Go check out our “Ultimate Sports Parent” workbook/CD program. You'll also discover:
* How to communicate with your young athletes.
* How to help them establish appropriate goals.
* How to help them trust their skills on game day.
* How to help them cope with competitive pressure.
* And other tips!
Sincerely,
Patrick Cohn, Ph.D., Mental Training Expert
& Lisa Cohn, Youth Sports Parenting Author
P.S. For more ideas about how to boost kids' confidence in sports,
check out our workbook/CD program – just for sports parents.
http://youthsportspsychology.com/
© 2007 The Ultimate Sports Parent by Peak Performance Sports
http://www.youthsportspsychology.com/
First, sports parents and coaches should help young athletes understand that they create their own sports confidence mindset. If kids begin a game needing immediate results (such as getting the first hit or basket of the game), they're hurting their confidence.
It is critical to remind young athletes that they've been practicing to develop confidence for many years. Don't let them lose their hard-earned confidence by worrying about achieving immediate results!
What's more, athletes need to understand that they'll be more successful if they assume full responsibility for their own confidence before competition begins. This is why it's called self-confidence!
Often, athletes take a back seat approach and wait until they make a couple of plays before they decide how confident they should feel.
If this is how your young athlete thinks, they need positive results before they feel confident. In other words, they need to make that great hit or basket before they can begin to feel confident.
If this is true of the young athletes in your life, you can help. Tell them they need to change how they think before entering competition. Tell them not to worry about making that first hit, goal or basket right away!
Instead, they should draw on their many successes even before the game or competition begins.
We suggest that you learn how to boost your child’s confidence. And we can help. Go check out our “Ultimate Sports Parent” workbook/CD program. You'll also discover:
* How to communicate with your young athletes.
* How to help them establish appropriate goals.
* How to help them trust their skills on game day.
* How to help them cope with competitive pressure.
* And other tips!
Sincerely,
Patrick Cohn, Ph.D., Mental Training Expert
& Lisa Cohn, Youth Sports Parenting Author
P.S. For more ideas about how to boost kids' confidence in sports,
check out our workbook/CD program – just for sports parents.
http://youthsportspsychology.com/
© 2007 The Ultimate Sports Parent by Peak Performance Sports
http://www.youthsportspsychology.com/
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Sports Parents Need Mental Training Too
Have I ever told you that I grew up in a sports-crazed family with five kids?
30 years ago when I played football, hockey, golf, and lacrosse year round, our dad was an enthusiastic sports parent. He often impeached us to play harder and live up to our abilities. He was quick to express his frustration with refs and coaches.
My dad (and mom) was so into our games, he couldn't restrain himself. That was both good and bad for the five of us. We liked all the attention, but often felt pressured to perform better - and better!
Now that I am a sports parent myself, I understand just how difficult it is for parents--like my dad--to figure out how best to support and help their kids in sports. And as a leading sports psychology expert, we've been studying this issue.
Sports parents today have many tough questions to answer: Should you push kids to try harder in sports when you know they have the athletic ability? What do you say or do after your child or teen's crushing defeat?
What to do if your daughter worries constantly about what others think of her sports performance? How do you behave on the sidelines when you are frustrated with coaches or refs?
These are hard questions, and the answers are not always obvious.
I have heard from many parents, like you, who are struggling with these issues - and many others. Now, my sister Lisa Cohn, an award- winning parenting writer, and I have teamed up to teach you how to boost kids' confidence and help you be a great sports parent!
We just released an innovative new program for sports parents, "The Ultimate Sports Parent: A 14-Day Plan for Kids" Success in Sports.'
Our cutting-edge CD/Workbook program tells parents just what to say and do to improve their kids' confidence, success and happiness in sports. It's based on 15 years of experience working with athletes and young athletes.
As Julia Dreyer, a sports mom to two champion equestrians says:
"As parents, we supply our sports kids with all the best in equipment
and coaches. But just having the right mindset using sports psychology
is the least expensive and most effective investment in them."
Click here to read read more about how parents can help kids in sports.
Thanks,
Patrick J. Cohn, Ph.D.,
Master Mental Game Coach
P.S. We recently re-launched our online mental training program with more programs and mental game tools to help you reach your potential. Grab your subscription today and get 30% off *The Ultimate Sports Parent* and other programs. Go here for a demo: Online Mental Training Program
30 years ago when I played football, hockey, golf, and lacrosse year round, our dad was an enthusiastic sports parent. He often impeached us to play harder and live up to our abilities. He was quick to express his frustration with refs and coaches.
My dad (and mom) was so into our games, he couldn't restrain himself. That was both good and bad for the five of us. We liked all the attention, but often felt pressured to perform better - and better!
Now that I am a sports parent myself, I understand just how difficult it is for parents--like my dad--to figure out how best to support and help their kids in sports. And as a leading sports psychology expert, we've been studying this issue.
Sports parents today have many tough questions to answer: Should you push kids to try harder in sports when you know they have the athletic ability? What do you say or do after your child or teen's crushing defeat?
What to do if your daughter worries constantly about what others think of her sports performance? How do you behave on the sidelines when you are frustrated with coaches or refs?
These are hard questions, and the answers are not always obvious.
I have heard from many parents, like you, who are struggling with these issues - and many others. Now, my sister Lisa Cohn, an award- winning parenting writer, and I have teamed up to teach you how to boost kids' confidence and help you be a great sports parent!
We just released an innovative new program for sports parents, "The Ultimate Sports Parent: A 14-Day Plan for Kids" Success in Sports.'
Our cutting-edge CD/Workbook program tells parents just what to say and do to improve their kids' confidence, success and happiness in sports. It's based on 15 years of experience working with athletes and young athletes.
As Julia Dreyer, a sports mom to two champion equestrians says:
"As parents, we supply our sports kids with all the best in equipment
and coaches. But just having the right mindset using sports psychology
is the least expensive and most effective investment in them."
Click here to read read more about how parents can help kids in sports.
Thanks,
Patrick J. Cohn, Ph.D.,
Master Mental Game Coach
P.S. We recently re-launched our online mental training program with more programs and mental game tools to help you reach your potential. Grab your subscription today and get 30% off *The Ultimate Sports Parent* and other programs. Go here for a demo: Online Mental Training Program
Sunday, February 18, 2007
Youth Sports Tips: How Perfectionism Holds Back Kids in Sports
One of the biggest challenges for young athletes today: They try to be too perfect with their performance. They try to have the perfect game or match.
Don't get us wrong. There are some advantages to perfectionism. Perfectionist kids have a strong work ethic, are committed to goals, and are willing to learn and improve. These great traits often disguise this 'mental roadblock' to success.
Kids who try to be too perfect can undermine their performance in many ways. They often expect too much of themselves, are afraid of failing, feel anxious, are frustrated, and worry too much about results. This can stifle their talent.
For example, a perfectionist athlete unknowingly embraces very high expectations. When he does not achieve his expectations, he feels frustrated and thinks he's failed.
Below is a recent example from a baseball dad about his son:
***********************************************
'My son is a good athlete who has always had good success.
However, he seems to focus on the negative, not the positive.
If he is practicing hitting, and doesn't make good contact,
after about three swings I hear 'I stink.' Unfortunately,
things tend to go down hill from there.'
~Baseball Dad
***********************************************
Perfectionists think that maintaining strict expectations is a good thing. They believe that the only other option is to accept mediocrity, which they are not willing to do.
But we have a different take on this:
If kids cannot reach their expectations, then become frustrated and lose their composure, they won't achieve their full potential in sports.
In our new program designed just for sports parents, we teach you how to help your child cope with high expectations and perfectionism. You also learn 13 other important mental game lessons designed to help ensure kids' success in sports.
Our new program, 'The Ultimate Sports Parent: A 14-Day Plan for Kids' Success in Sports' teaches you to help your child perform without the burden of expectations and perfectionism.
We suggest that you grab your copy today at our special introductory price. But don't delay. The first printing will fly off the shelves when we release this program to the general public.
Read more about how to become The Ultimate Sports Parent:
http://youthsportspsychology.com/ultimate_sports_parent_workbook.php
THE ULTIMATE SPORTS PARENT by Peak Performance Sports
http://www.youthsportspsychology.com/
P.S. Stop guessing what to say to your child to boost her confidence and success. We teach you the 14 most important sports parenting lessons with our easy-to-follow workbook and CD program. Plus, you get four special bonuses all for a small investment of $89.00 for a limited time only!
Learn how sports parents can encourage their kids in sports
Don't get us wrong. There are some advantages to perfectionism. Perfectionist kids have a strong work ethic, are committed to goals, and are willing to learn and improve. These great traits often disguise this 'mental roadblock' to success.
Kids who try to be too perfect can undermine their performance in many ways. They often expect too much of themselves, are afraid of failing, feel anxious, are frustrated, and worry too much about results. This can stifle their talent.
For example, a perfectionist athlete unknowingly embraces very high expectations. When he does not achieve his expectations, he feels frustrated and thinks he's failed.
Below is a recent example from a baseball dad about his son:
***********************************************
'My son is a good athlete who has always had good success.
However, he seems to focus on the negative, not the positive.
If he is practicing hitting, and doesn't make good contact,
after about three swings I hear 'I stink.' Unfortunately,
things tend to go down hill from there.'
~Baseball Dad
***********************************************
Perfectionists think that maintaining strict expectations is a good thing. They believe that the only other option is to accept mediocrity, which they are not willing to do.
But we have a different take on this:
If kids cannot reach their expectations, then become frustrated and lose their composure, they won't achieve their full potential in sports.
In our new program designed just for sports parents, we teach you how to help your child cope with high expectations and perfectionism. You also learn 13 other important mental game lessons designed to help ensure kids' success in sports.
Our new program, 'The Ultimate Sports Parent: A 14-Day Plan for Kids' Success in Sports' teaches you to help your child perform without the burden of expectations and perfectionism.
We suggest that you grab your copy today at our special introductory price. But don't delay. The first printing will fly off the shelves when we release this program to the general public.
Read more about how to become The Ultimate Sports Parent:
http://youthsportspsychology.com/ultimate_sports_parent_workbook.php
THE ULTIMATE SPORTS PARENT by Peak Performance Sports
http://www.youthsportspsychology.com/
P.S. Stop guessing what to say to your child to boost her confidence and success. We teach you the 14 most important sports parenting lessons with our easy-to-follow workbook and CD program. Plus, you get four special bonuses all for a small investment of $89.00 for a limited time only!
Learn how sports parents can encourage their kids in sports
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